Mohinder Suresh (
seekevolution) wrote2014-01-15 06:13 pm
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Quarantine
News had a way of spreading a little too quickly. The moment Nathan had fallen at the press conference, media began having it's field day. Mohinder paid little attention.
He arrived at Odessa fourteen hours after the incident, severely jet-lagged and with a computer pre-loaded with all of the information that the Company thought he'd need. Mohinder had been down this road before, though never with such dire circumstances. The Shanti Virus was a subject near and dear to his heart, though it was far less stressful when all he needed to cure it was a bit of blood. Even though it was his own blood, at least he felt as if he was doing something.
Knowing from experience that not everything was black and white anymore, Mohinder kept his laptop and medical kit close at hand and made his way to the quarantine line with a grim look in his redrimmed black eyes. "Mohinder Suresh," he said, forgetting his title again for just a moment. "Doctor. You need to let me through."
The National Guard service man looked wary before radioing it in through the barricade. It was tense. Mohinder's shoulder bag slipped twice and he nearly dropped his sample kit. "All right, cleared to go in. Good luck, doctor."
Mohinder nodded, rubbing the back of his neck. He'd gone from New York to India and back again in two days, bringing Molly to stay with his mother. After what Sylar did to her, again, he could not risk leaving her in anyone else's care. Not with Matt gone.
Seeing the man, however, after he'd just gone off on this quest to find his father at the expense of helping him with a child they both sort of promised to look out for, did not make Mohinder smile. If anything, it only made the lines on his face etch in more deeply. He stood in front of him, looking as tired as Mohinder felt, ill fitting clothing a bit more rumpled than usual. Never mind, of course, that Mohinder had done his fair share of leaving too on his attempts to bait the Company through lectures across the globe. "Do I have a lab yet?" Mohinder asked. No greetings. No necessities. That's what happens when you abandon people, Matt.
He arrived at Odessa fourteen hours after the incident, severely jet-lagged and with a computer pre-loaded with all of the information that the Company thought he'd need. Mohinder had been down this road before, though never with such dire circumstances. The Shanti Virus was a subject near and dear to his heart, though it was far less stressful when all he needed to cure it was a bit of blood. Even though it was his own blood, at least he felt as if he was doing something.
Knowing from experience that not everything was black and white anymore, Mohinder kept his laptop and medical kit close at hand and made his way to the quarantine line with a grim look in his redrimmed black eyes. "Mohinder Suresh," he said, forgetting his title again for just a moment. "Doctor. You need to let me through."
The National Guard service man looked wary before radioing it in through the barricade. It was tense. Mohinder's shoulder bag slipped twice and he nearly dropped his sample kit. "All right, cleared to go in. Good luck, doctor."
Mohinder nodded, rubbing the back of his neck. He'd gone from New York to India and back again in two days, bringing Molly to stay with his mother. After what Sylar did to her, again, he could not risk leaving her in anyone else's care. Not with Matt gone.
Seeing the man, however, after he'd just gone off on this quest to find his father at the expense of helping him with a child they both sort of promised to look out for, did not make Mohinder smile. If anything, it only made the lines on his face etch in more deeply. He stood in front of him, looking as tired as Mohinder felt, ill fitting clothing a bit more rumpled than usual. Never mind, of course, that Mohinder had done his fair share of leaving too on his attempts to bait the Company through lectures across the globe. "Do I have a lab yet?" Mohinder asked. No greetings. No necessities. That's what happens when you abandon people, Matt.
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Good. Very good. The weight from his shoulders lifted by hands much stronger than his own changed his entire posture. He leaned forward, eager to engage, eager to have Matt's attention for something lighter. His shoulder dropped and he laughed.
"Psyched is a very good word," he concluded. "There's a subway stop on the way to Molly's school as well so getting her to and from would be incredibly easy. And she'd be certainly set for college. We ought to move the process along to legally adopt her," he mentioned. "If only so she can have access to your healthcare."
Why not discuss these things as if they were a couple? They already were, for all intents and purposes!
"I suppose we'd need to find a lawyer... But sticky, this situation."
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He tilted his head slightly as the topic of adoption was brought up again. It had been talked about a few times before that, so the subject in itself was no problem - there was always just the idea of explaining.
'A bit sticky' was quite an apt description of the whole situation, really.
"Yeah. Tell you the truth? I can't ... not worry that some old aunt or grandfather twice whatever is going to crawl out of the woodwork and try to take her from us."
She didn't have anyone else, they both knew that. Through an unfortunate and seemingly unconnected series of incidents, all of Molly's close family were dead. But that didn't stop the thoughts. Any court would rule in favour of blood ties.
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Of course, it played into Mohinder's fears of losing his family due to his own inability to hang onto them or some freak accident of personality that would drive them off. No matter the soothing Matt did towards him, there was always just a hint of worry--
It came with any relationship, no matter the intensity. Friendships could end just as easily as romances. With a child involved, it made him nervous.
"I simply try to remember to breathe," he confided. "When the anxiety creeps up." Like now. With Matt looking at him like that. Mohinder finished his tea and stood. "I think I ought to get to bed. I'm already horribly jetlagged and I want to do well tomorrow."
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He looked up at Mohinder when he stood and felt an unexpected wave of fondness towards him but wasn't at all sure how to articulate that or even if he should so he just wound up looking confued for a second, with himself, but then he smiled and let that be.
"Yeah, get some sleep. Molly will probably wake you when we're leaving."
He'd managed to arrange things so he could both drop Molly off and pick her up the following day, but Mohinder would get the honor of managing that balancing act between work and parental obligations the days after that for the near future.
Matt would stay up a bit longer, but not terribly so, and before he went to sleep and double-checked the alarm he listened in real quick to both Molly's and Mohinder's dreams.
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As expected, Molly did indeed rouse Mohinder in the morning by insisting loudly that she could do her own hair and wanted it braided instead of in a ponytail like the other girls. She was sassy when she tested the waters and told Matt that he shouldn't be in charge of her hairsyle when his own involved an electric razor and a little bit of soap.
In a pair of loose fitting sleeping pants, bare feet and bare chest, Mohinder peeked out of his room at the pair and, glasses a little crooked and hasily thrown on, beckoned for Matt to give him over the brush.
"Let me do it then," he said. "We'll teach Matt how to braid tonight."
"I can probably do it myself," she shot back, reproachful, but sat down just the same. Mohinder longed for a latte so very badly as he got to work on Molly's hair.
"You absolutely can, but not five minutes before you're out the door. Sit still."
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"Can you do a fishbone braid, Mohinder?" Molly asked after a moment, sitting still with an air of impatience and turning her head slightly since she was talking to him. "I want to learn those! They're really pretty."
Matt wasn't listening cause he'd gone from staring to not being sure where to stare and that was actually a lot more complicated than it should be allowed to be. He eventually managed to tear his eyes away and busied himself with fiddling with the suit jacket and loosening his tie a little, before he threw on his coat and counted the papers he had to bring back in, looking anywhere but at the pair. It was decidedly fidgety.
"Okay, Molly, c'mon", he said the second Mohinder let her go. Molly went after him, came back for her backpack which she'd dropped by Mohinder's feet, and was out the door. Matt didn't look back when he called "Good luck!" over his shoulder and closed the door behind him with a sense of relief.
He walked Molly to school, got back to the precinct to pour over the case (homicide, possibly accidental but that'd still rule it manslaughter), and was more distracted than he'd like to admit until he'd had two cups of coffee and gotten the first rundown of the day from Fuller.
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Just another hectic morning. Oh, it felt so wonderful. He woke to turn on the television Matt must have bought while he was in India and flicked through the various stations to find some news on what Matt had mentioned the night before. Two weeks after the fact and there were still news tickers about Odessa, about cover ups, about politians denying anything but a serious flu-- Interviews with colleges of Nathan Petrelli filled an entire segment before Mohinder forced himself to shut the television off.
He took his time showering and dressing. He shaved. He made the effort to wear his glasses since Matt said it made him look smarter. He packed a briefcase with paper to print out his resume and CV at the library on the way and snagged himself some Starbucks as he hopped onto the subway.
Just after three, when Matt was still likely waiting for Molly's school to let out, the detective would receive a call from an overly excited Indian.
"You'll have to start addressing me as professor again!" he all but purred. Even at a distance, his happiness radiated.
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When his phone vibrated at him and he read Mohinder's name on the display, he didn't waste time answering. It took a split second for Matt to figure out what that way of greetings meant, but when he did, he reacted with a grin in his voice. "Oh, sweet! You got it?"
That was really good news. It'd really help them get back on their feet, not to mention make Mohinder a lot happier - and offer a lot more stability for Molly. Despite the discussion of Odessa and what dangers they still might have to deal with, it felt like things were finally starting to fall into place. Properly.
"When do you start?"
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More parental decisions, always something to make them feel connected to one another, to make whatever else they had going on wash away again.
"I'm about to lose you to the subway, but will you be home tonight? Or are you on a case?" Matt didn't really talk about his job or what he's working on, but Mohinder understood that sometimes being a detective meant working nights. Once Matt confirmed he'd be pulling a late one, Mohinder still smiled. "That's fine. I'll get Molly to bed and we can celebrate ourselves when you get home. Talk to you tonight."
He didn't mean it the way it sounded... And ooh, oh how it did sound so promisingly dirty.
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She was happy - excited. No doubt Mohinder would be tackled by an excited little girl with lots of questions when he got home, but Matt had to leave her for the half hour-forty five minutes it'd take for Mohinder to get there. He couldn't help but fuss. Obviously.
"Number's on the fridge, Molly."
"I know, Matt! I'm going to go draw."
After some discussion with Mohinder about it Matt had gotten a cell phone to keep around the apartment until they'd figure out a landline. It was an outdated thing that only had a few numbers in it but it'd do in case anything came up if she was home alone and had to reach them.
"I'll be home real late, okay? Go to bed when Mohinder tells you to."
She made a face at him but then she smiled and he kissed her hair before he headed back to the station.
The thing about being a mind reader and also being a cop was the constant balancing act. Matt knew a lot more than any of the people he worked with but he could hardly tell them that. The guy they were interrogating kept thinking about another guy, a name that kept popping up in his head, but he never said anything about it and there were no links between that name and the scene.
In essence, Matt was working a bit backwards. Instead of evidence leading him to the facts he was often trying to find evidence in order to justify something he already knew. It was ... interesting. And kind of frustrating.
All in all, they made some headway, but a lot of it was of the tiring, lots-of-talking-taking-statements-paperwork variety and Matt was yawning when he finally made it home.
He toed his shoes off, hung up the coat, and was removing the tie from around his neck when he entered the still-sparsely decorated living room to find Mohinder with some book.
"Hey", he started, then showed a tired grin. "Prof. Molly asleep?"
Of course she was, but it was a way of touching ground.
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Once he was finished, he put a marker in the book and uncurled himself from the couch to take Matt's tie from him (yes, right out of his hand as if he wasn't capable of rolling it up himself) and head to the fridge. There was a neat little stack of dishes in there to be warmed up and after getting the stove and oven going, Mohinder disappeared into Matt's room to tuck the tie away.
He'd done his laundry that evening, he didn't see why it might be considered invasive to open the other man's drawers.
Bustling around taking care of Matt might be considered to be just a bit housewifishly, but he had a month or so of nothing to do, why not care for his family? Getting Molly to school, seeing Matt home from work-- It seemed so normal. He was so incredibly excited about it!
"I hope you don't mind curry. I have some chicken as well if you feel the need for extra protein." He'd let Matt cut it up, however, once the oven was done it's job.
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He undid the top button of his shirt to get to breathe a bit easier now when the tie was gone and rolled up his sleeves before he went to investigate the curry in question. It wasn't a bad look for him - although he much preferred jeans and a t-shirt, suits looked classy on anyone and had a charming quality when partly dressed down.
"Thanks, man", he said, feeling a bit like yawning again but not quite managing to when he after a moment by the sink sank down into a kitchen chair, running a hand through his hair. Just tired, though. Not upset, not unhappy. Just glad to be home. "Feels like I haven't eaten all day. Thank god for coffee." Then he shot Mohinder another grin. "And uh, congratulations. Science, right?"
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He'd just leave out the note on the napkin for Matt. Something told him that he might not appreciate it. And what would it say anyhow? 'You make me feel safe when you smile?' Or how about 'Have a good day at work, I love you?' Both might go over about as well as a sinking ship.
It didn't occur to him that Matt might be too tired to guard against reading thoughts either. He went about his business as usual.
Mohinder inhaled softly, tugging up the sleeve of an over sized sweatshirt he'd been lounging in, and reached over head for a bowl with little kittens on the inside of it. Molly's....but they were a bit hard up on dishes.
"Theory this coming semester. Science basics but yes. No more cabs."
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And that made him feel nervous in a way that was altogether too physical because he still didn't know what he wanted to say, exactly. But there'd have to be something.
"That's good", he said, only a tiny bit shaky in his voice. "You'd start climbing the walls otherwise. But really, I- I'm happy for you."
Yeah, they had to talk, but that didn't mean he couldn't stall.
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It was an easy easy way he laughed as he returned to the sink to clean up and then to the kettle to pour himself some tea. It was late, late enough that he hoped Matt could sleep in a little tomorrow. He'd get Molly off to school just fine on his own. A little walk might do him good. He was even planning on going to the grocery tomorrow and perhaps to the book store to find something on braiding.
He'd have to call his mother and thank her for that. Their girl was obsessed with it now! India had really interested her, and he was glad to share as much as he could with her curious little mind when she wasn't fretting about fingernail polish and if she was old enough to wear lip gloss.
Lip gloss! Oh he thought he'd have another year or two before this happened!
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He laughed at the Molly thing, shaking his head. There wasn't a lot to say about that but he loved the girl dearly. She had her antics, but she was clever. And had a mature way about her that they'd both learned to look out for.
Thanking Mohinder for the food he ate in relative silence for the most part, keeping a tentative ear out for the other man's thoughts, but as they mostly revolved around Molly he felt himself relax a bit.
He still couldn't quite focus though, not really, and when he'd eaten he went to wash the dishes - not allowing Mohinder to, because honestly. He made quick work of it though and then wiped his hands on a towel and leaned back against the sink, feeling like he was twelve and about to make a speech in front of the class.
"Hey, Mohinder?" he said, veeery tentatively, and looked up with some hesitation. "So uh, I get the feeling that ... that there's something we should talk about."
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He could actually feel his throat closing and his mind raced back to anything he might have thought about. Lingered over. Matt at the sink washing up, sleeves rolled up? Yes, he'd admired him.
Oh God, about the lunches--
Mohinder had no way whatsoever of policing his thoughts, it turned out. He sat frozen in the chair, trying not to be defensive.
"Yes, likely," he said, looking at the table. "Very likely. I'm doing my best to keep my thoughts neutral, Matt. I realise they make you uncomfortable but I want you to know that I would never-- I would never do anything to cross that boundary. I'm very sorry." Better to admit it and nip it in the bud now.
Just in case Matt was afraid he'd jump on him later.
Or...
Or maybe Matt was just wanting to talk about buying whole milk instead of 2%. Mohinder's face flashed a bright copper.
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"No, I know, I know", he said quickly, wanting to make it clear that he did trust Mohinder. He'd never once thought that he'd - jump on him, yeah. He hadn't even considered that. He'd just spent a lot of time kind of confused and then after that fighting with himself about it.
He sighed and was gnawing on the inside of his cheek again, having a hard time looking at Mohinder, and so the table got to carry both of their downcast gazes.
"It's just ... um, I was freaking out a little, to be honest", he managed, sounding apologetic. "You probably noticed. A bit. It's just ... it's not a situation I'm exactly used to anymore and ... so that's why I stopped listening", he added, looking up, hoping that'd explain that. "But ... I don't know. I missed you, I guess."
He was building up to something, but he wasn't sure how to proceed, exactly, so he let that be for now, waiting for Mohinder to .. well, to misinterpret it, honestly. It's how things usually went with them.
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"I missed being here," Mohinder said, almost tentatively. Matt was telling him that whatever his feelings were, he still thought of him as a friend, and it was somewhat a relief, really, even if his stomach twisted. No one wanted to have a one sided emotion confirmed, after all.
But what did he expect? Matt was straight, had been with the same woman since high school, and all he knew was women. Mohinder himself was mostly straight too. At least, he'd found himself more attracted to women then to men, but his sexuality was always based on personality. Anyone interested in him, even if he ended up exaggerating it, tended to form into a crush pretty damned quickly.
It wasn't Matt's fault. He was just a nice guy. A good guy. A guy Mohinder could see himself with and--
Stop, stop, stop, he yelled at himself, swallowing, his chin hitting his chest.
"I don't want you to feel as if you have to stunt the growth potential of your ability because of my... Because of me. It won't come in the way of our friendship, or in the way of raising Molly. Just-- Tell me if I'm making you...err...freak out."
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"You freak me out all the damn time, Mohinder", he said, still sort of hiding his face a bit, and practically hearing the defeat in Mohinder's head he added before he could say anything, "no, not like that, just ... just hear me out."
He was silent, for a moment. He opened his mouth and closed it again and then threw back his head and stared up at the ceiling before he managed to start talking again.
"Okay, so ... so here's the thing." God, his heart was practically in his throat, no wonder the words came to him so slowly. "You've been thinking ... about me. And- and that's okay, it's just ... new. But lately I've been ... thinking ... about you, too."
He didn't actually feel all that much better after saying that, but he managed to give Mohinder a look that was a mix between pleading and plain uncertain. Then he laughed again and ran a hand over his face.
"And you have no idea how freaky that is to a guy like me. Like, I've just ... been going over it in my head, you know, what does it mean, what do I do with it ..."
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Matt wasn't the sort to joke with someone like this. He wasn't a cruel person. Mohinder couldn't do much but trust what he said was true. And still-- "What?" Dropping that on him felt like an assault. He had prepared himself for disappointment. Not for hope. Switching gears wasn't easy on him.
Openly staring at Matt before his gaze refocused on his palms, Mohinder tried to get his tongue to work.
"That--" he cleared his throat. "That is a conundrum. I don't-- things don't--" He switches gear to Hindi. The words were fluid and quick and though Matt doesn't understand, he didn't have to. Passionate as always, Mohinder stood and gestured to his chest, eyes refocusing completely on the other man as he took just one step closer.
"What I'm trying to say," he said in English, "is that, if you'd let me-- There's no reason we can't fumble through this too."
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"Yeah?" He couldn't mask the nervousness in his tone, but he tried for a smile. "That ... sounds like a whole lot of fumbling."
He felt pulled towards the other man in a very inexplicable way and he was balancing that pull now, not entirely ready to fall into it, but very aware of it. There were some thoughts about what to even call it - dating? - and what would happen if that ended, and some predictable heterosexual ... not panic. No, it wasn't like that anymore, but just some doubts.
But then he realized that the smile, as unsure as it was in many respects, was absolutely sincere, too. He stuck his hands in his pockets. It was almost shy. "What would that mean, exactly? Sorry, you, uh, you might want to spell it out for me."
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"I'm not a social scientist," he replied. "I'm afraid I would do a terrible job explaining the variables correctly, or even meaningfully." Matt's expression was just too perfect. He pressed his thumbs together in front of him before he finished crossing the distance between them.
Matt might resist the pull, but Mohinder had just been told that he didn't have to. And how wonderful was that?
"I could perhaps-- a demonstration--?" He suggested it with a sly smile and a craning of his neck. Keeping his hands to himself, Mohinder's cheek touched one gruff with five o'clock shadow. His lips were soft when they connected to Matt's mouth.
It might not be perfect, but at least it was real.
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It was soft. It was sweet, fairly short - just a gentle press of lips at first, to test the new ground - and had Matt look at Mohinder in a slightly incredulous way when he leaned back, but he did so with a gently crooked smile.
"Okay", he said, "I never thought we'd do that." Then he seemed to correct himself. "I never thought I'd do that. You've been thinking a lot." It wasn't meant in any way other than observation but then Matt kind of rolled his eyes at himself and added a kind of distracted "look, can I-?" before he leaned in to try his lips against Mohinder's again.
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Matt kissed him gently, like he kissed women, Mohinder thought in amusement. It didn't bother him at all. Men typically kissed other men more fiercely. But Matt was careful with him and Mohinder appreciated that. He understood why. All Matt knew was women. One woman in particular. Learning a whole knew person? That would certainly be a challenge to get over.
Letting the older man lead would work in Mohinder's benefit. Every dance needed a leader didn't they?
Go on. Touch my hair.
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<3 Missed you!!!
missed you more! welcome back <3
It's so good to be back.
I imagine, it sounded like such a hassle. /pets
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